September 1, 2011 marks the day when this blog received its first follower. Once I saw the news on my dashboard, I felt great and there was happiness just radiating out of me. Man, was I ecstatic. I called and messaged some of my best buddies and let them know what was going on and how excited I was. Then after descending from Cloud Nine, something else set in and took the emotion's place. Slowly, I started to become nervous and self-conscious. Uninvited questions started to tear through my train of thought and made things more complex. Would this person like what you have to say? Is your blog going to be geared toward this person? Will you change yourself, like you have before, just to please people? Are you going to be satisfied? Do you feel like the chase is over? Maybe it's not a big deal to some, but it's something I have been dealing with for a long time.
There's something you should know about me. I'm always up for trying new and exciting things and I will be attached to this particular "thing" by the hip for a while. Then, I'll hit a milestone and then the thrill is no where to be found. Let's just take blogging for example. One of the main things about blogging is that people, that are not familiar to you, will read what you have to write. After this, they have to determine whether or not they will follow you so that when they sign on to their respective account, they are able to see any of your new entries that you posted. If the answer is "no" then the process stops here. If not, they have to either copy your URL identification and paste it in the managing section of their reading list. Or maybe there's a simpler way that I am not familiar with. There's always an easier way. Having a follower is one of the biggest accomplishments a blogger will have. Once I find out that there is a person who is interested and following what I have to say, I start asking myself; What should I look forward to now? If I have no answer to that, then it's on to the next best thing.
After thinking about all the work that this person had to do to follow this particular blog, I started to become nervous. What do I have to do to keep this person interested so that he doesn't angrily eradicate me from his reading list? After talking with a good friend of mine, I started to remember exactly why I made this blog in the first place. This blog wasn't made to please people and force me to change to the beat of other people's hearts. It's main purpose was for me to share what I think and my experiences. If I lose that, then this blog will just be another unnecessary burden on my life. The very point other people come to follow your blogs is to experience a new way of thought and the person you are. If you lose your sense of identity, then you become the generic, lifeless, bland reading material that you promised yourself that you'll never become.
Unfortunately, I have a loose sense of identity. Throughout my life, the only thing that stayed constant about me is my bad sense of fashion. Everything else just changes with the tide, it's why being consistent is so difficult to me. It may have been the way I was programmed or maybe I'm just a guy that bores easily. But nevertheless, this blogging experience has been great and is something that I do want to continue. If I ever do start slacking. I give you each permission to give me one backhand across the face until I regain my senses.
I kinda missed out on the excitement of having a new follower, because I had one right from the start. However, I did worry that she would be my only follower and that my repetition and lack of progress in dealing with my issues would bore her, annoy her, and send her running.
ReplyDeleteIt was tough not to compromise what I wanted my blog to be about vs. what my reader(s?) wanted to read. But stick with what you want to blog about. This is *your* house, present it however you want. Write how you feel, own it, believe in it and people will stick with it no mater what it's about. That's what people tell me.
btw: I saw The Help today. It was so damn good! I cried like a little bitch. Not just once, either. Like...five times. It was embarrassing. Then I went home and blogged about being intimidated by the fit women in my life.
Are you sure you want me as a follower? lol
Haha, things just made a little bit more sense after your comment. I'm glad you liked the movie. I think we are going to hear a lot more about that movie in the future. Thanks for your words. I think the people that you are referring to are right. If people didn't want to experience new way of thinking, they wouldn't follow someone in the first place, right? So, by giving them what they want is really just giving them what they don't want...That made more sense in my mind. But the good news is that I'm already getting used to this. But anyway, nobody is without problems so yes, I still want you as a follower. Thanks again.
ReplyDelete