The last few days have been very confusing. My parents and I had a talk about what's going to come and even members of my immediate family got word of my situation. After some time of deliberation it seems as if my parents want me to go back to school, immediately. Their reason was that if I didn't hold up my status as a full time student, I would have to start to pay for my own insurance. However, in reality, that's not really the case is it? According to the ObamaCare policy passed in 2010, all young adults up to the age of 26 can be covered under their parent's insurance policy, whether or not they are a full time student. So in other words, my parents want me to go back to school and graduate with some sort of a degree because if I don't, I wouldn't be under their insurance plan anymore. It wasn't until a little later after my discussion with my parents that my brother clued me in on this policy.
But in the few moments in between talking to my parents and finding about the plan, I felt good that my parent's wanted me to go back to school. It might not be the school I am necessarily in, in all likeliness it most likely will not be. I don't know what it was but inside I felt a little relieved. Nevertheless, at the same time, I wanted some time to myself to figure out what it is that I want and to rebuild myself. I have no money in the bank. I don't have any true dreams or aspirations. Today, as I was driving back home from saying goodbye to my city apartment for good, I fantasized about me singing whatever it was I was listening to at that moment, and the crowd going wild. But it all honesty, I don't have a singing voice and I don't know how to dance. So that isn't a fruitful future goal either. I don't know what I'm supposed to do and the past week or two I have been readying myself for a loaded work schedule. My mind was set on attacking these loans at full speed and now, I have to think about going back to school. Some people might call me a very selfish and ungrateful person and based on what I have done the past few years, I agree. That doesn't change the fact that I feel truly lost and I don't know what to do.
I thought I was the only one that wondered what it would be like to spontaneously dazzle someone with a song. However, my singing voice is only average, so it wouldn't be all that awesome.
ReplyDeleteGood luck figuring out what you want to do. I guess I'm lucky that I already know. However, I'm most definitely a starving artist, so that's... a drawback.
Thanks ABFTS, I really appreciate it. You are lucky. Hopefully, one of these days, preferentially soon, I will too know what it is I want to do.
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